


Glass Walls

by soupsalad



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Character Death, M/M, Nuka-World Amusement Park (Fallout), add more characters as they show up i think, also chapter 1 has some discussion about trans stuff, major to x9 but idk, not major i dont think becuase hes not major at all, so idk what to call that it aint phobia everyones pretty cool about it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-07-08 15:41:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19872037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soupsalad/pseuds/soupsalad
Summary: X9-27 could not stay in the institute a second longer, not after the death of the one he loved. Its after his departure that he finds himself in the nuka world gauntlet by chance. With gages plan to find a new overboss, X9 quickly finds himself in a position hes not even sure hes ready to fill. With gages help he is sure he can improve, gage is sure of this as well.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> my friend said im not valid for liking gage so when they see this, with their fave and least fave together, they may go absolutely feral. if i die blame this fic. love yall. JKJK

Gage doesn't know much about him. He's a man of few words, he's tall and built like a fortress, he's definitely someone whos had his fair share of taking orders, but that's all there really is that he knows.

X9 walks ahead of him with a single idea in mind. Complete the mission before him. If it was just beating someone and putting a collar on them so be it. There was no institute over his shoulder anymore. Any degenerate courser who wanted to follow the example of the synth at Libertalia was free to do as he pleased. 

He can't help but remember how fast everything happened, Z2, fathers parent, bunker hill, the betrayal. Gage says something behind him but he does not hear it and falls down the stairs of the third rail, a few things falling from his pockets as he tumbles down. He realized now that gage was warning him not to step on something that he was not paying attention to.

He grunts when he lands at the bottom, long black hair splayed out on the floor beneath him. A few people too drunk to care joke about him being the one whos really intoxicated to make such a mistake but he pays them no mind. No time when there's a job to do.

"You good boss?" Gage stands over him with a hand to grab that X9 takes without hesitation.

"It was nothing," He's pulled up and stands eye to eye with the man. X9 looks at him to discern any sort of indication that he might have found the scenario funny. When he finds nothing however he turns away from him, snatching his hand away. "Let's go."

Gage follows, he always does. As little as he knew there was one thing he did know, and that was that this man took what he wanted and no one could stop him. A man like that had his respect. He just wished that one of those things he took was a chance on saying something more about himself once in a while. It was strange to have such a mystery as a leader. Thinking about it, it was strange for any person to be so mysterious.

They approach the target and lure them out somewhere else, the overboss speaks so calmly when approaching them. His voice is modulated, robotic just as Gage assumed a synth might sound. It's a bit funny when he thinks of it. 

When the target is alone they beat him senseless. The overboss needs nothing but his fist to earn himself the geyser of blood from their face. Gage laughs a bit at it all, the poor sucker had crossed the wrong person indeed. They beg the boss to stop and he looks at them for a minute as if he's debating it, and then punches them in the jaw. It's a sight to behold.

Gage has to laugh, its impossible to resist at this point. it's always funny when they beg and the overboss keeps going. He can't help but compare him to a cat, watching its prey curiously thrash around trying to escape, letting it think it won him over for a second before continuing to beat them into submission.

"Head to Nuka World." The overboss says plainly enough. "Find Nisha." and with that they're off, limping away with their tails between their legs. They spit a tooth to the floor while mourning the end of their freedom.

He watches them go for a minute before turning around to gage, empty eyes on him. It's then that he remembers that this man is not as hilarious as his actions. He takes no joy in what he does, and if he does Gage absolutely can't see it.

"Boss, you good?" He asks and X9 nods.

"I am fine." He looks over to the doorway to bar. "Is there anything you might want before we head back? I think a drink might be in order," 

Gage nods. It was always like this. The man finishes his job and celebrates with nothing more than a glass of water. He wasn't saying he would prefer a beer, could never trust the stuff, but the simplicity of it all was amusing in its own way. "You got it, boss." 

\-----

The walk back to the park is always a quiet one, and as much as gage was the kind to avoid talking about feelings and all things associated he can't help but be just a bit concerned that the future of Nuka-world was in the hands of a man who had spoken all of about 10 to 20 words to him in all the time he had known him.

"Boss," he decides to finally take the first step towards understanding him just a bit more. “Y’think we could talk for a minute?”

X9 who had been marching ahead stops in his tracks and turns around giving gage a look that tells the man that he was not particularly in the mood, as per usual.

Any other time he may have backed off. Said never mind and moved on but this was getting absurd now. He had to say something.

"Boss. Ima tell it to ya straight. I don't know shit about what's going on in that head of yours. You been workin hard, ain't gonna deny that but…" He ponders over his words under the overbosses glare. 

"Yes?" X9 asks with a tone far more mellow than his scathing expression. It's still a bit weird hearing a voice like his out of a face like that to gage but he managed.

"Well, boss, I know you got the right idea in mind. Y'keep up with what the gangs want, y'take what you can and anyone in your way you turn into mincemeat, y'keep yourself in tip-top shape n'dont fuck around like the other raiders I've known," He continues.

"And?" X9 asks wondering where he was going with this. He had his own ideas but he would not make assumptions just yet. 

"I know a ton about you boss, weapon preference, work ethic, your way of operating and interacting with folks, but I don't know shit about you." He admits. "All I know IS your name and that you were the unlucky fucker I saw promise in when you made your way through the gauntlet." 

X9s quiet and gage gives him a second. He knew the guy would pause quite a bit when deep in thought. He didn't even question his silence. 

"...you know my name?" He asks and gage groans.

"Well shit boss, here I was makin mental note of you not being the kind to hit chems and then you go and forget a whole ass conversation where y'told me your name like a fool huffin jet behind my back?" He ends his sentence chuckling over it. "Nines, right? Y'told me after the scrap with Colter." 

X9 nods. "So I did." And with that he turns around to keep walking.

Gage watches him go, shocked that he really did just turn around and start leaving. "Boss! Y'forget we were talkin too?" 

X9 turns back to him. "I assumed that was it. You don't know me well." He wasn't completely sure if he preferred it that way. Being known and coming to know a person was what had landed him in his near-perpetual misery. Opening up to a raider who seemed to take pleasure in life's dangers felt like the set up for another chance at aching should he reach a point where he could call him a friend.

"Well, the thing is boss, its weird as shit. Y'take the job I offer with no questions asked. Shoot colter with a water gun I say and y'do it, become the overboss I say and y'do it, I say jump and if you talked more I imagine you'd say how high or something. Y'dont ask questions, y'dont say anything, aint never met a guy with so few opinions as you. It's fuckin weird." Well he had, it was people with collars around their necks.

X9 nods. "My apologies. What do you want to know?" 

Gage feels like he's going to implode and it shows on his face. He grits his teeth and slaps a palm to his face.

"Boss, man, I admire you for not bending over backwards for any of the bastards out here, and for takin what's rightfully yours, bustin the shit outta these folks but… you still seem like the kinda guy cool with just takin orders." When he talks it's a lot with his hands X9 notices. 

X9 smiles at him, amused by how animated he was.

"See? That's the first time I've seen ya do shit with your face that isn't your typical-" and instead of describing the look he makes an over-exaggerated pout followed by a resting neutral expression. "You gotta take charge man. You're the damn overboss not the overbutler or overslave to the guys back at the park. You just keep doing what people tell you you're never gonna get any respect. You're a pushover runnin round pretending to be a raider!" He's got no reason to be yelling, its just something that happens when he gets passionate about what he's saying X9 observes.

"So I don't speak enough, I'm too... Eager to answer your questions, and You think my willingness to cooperate is a problem?" X9 asks.

"Well more or less. Cept that middle part. I don't mind that, just that last part kinda came to mind soon as you said you'd…" He stops. "Wait no fuck that. You're right. That second and third thing go hand in hand." He points to x9, narrowing his visible eye. "You gotta stop doing everything for folks at the drop of a hat. You act more like a trader trying to make a sale most of the time more than a raider. You keep it up and sooner or later someones gonna get the idea they can walk all over ya, after all. You always do what you're told. Someones gonna get the idea they can tell ya to back off and if it's to make em happy you'll gladly comply." 

X9 doesn't know what to make of this at all. "So. You want me to help the raiders in Nuka world...but you don't want me… To do it...willingly?" 

Gage shakes his head. "Nines. Tell me this. Do you enjoy this? Or are ya just doin in because I asked you to?" it was something he had been wanting to know since meeting him really.

"I…" He thinks on it. He was never one to call his work as a courser fun. It was just what he was made for. Killing came to him like breathing. It was as much a part of him as any of his limbs.

Gage looks at him expectantly planning for either answer to his question.

"Well. No. I do not enjoy it. I do not hate it. Killing is what I have always known. I live and to live for me has always been to take-" He stops knowing what he was about to say. "I have always lived to take orders." 

Gage scowls. "That's the problem. You don't feel like a leader. You might lead a little better than your average shit for brains commonwealth raider but you're a follower first. You gotta want this. You gotta want to be boss." 

X9 looks down at the grass as he was scolded. "I have no experience with wanting." 

Gage places a firm hand on his shoulder and leans down so they're face to face. "Ya never wanted anything in your life man? You never felt a single selfish thought, my guy? Really man?"

X9 shrugs. "Gage… i am not a man." 

Gages eyes widen and he stands upright, removing his hand quickly from x9s shoulder. Thinking back to how the overboss snatched away from him in the third rail he realizes the error of his ways.

"Well er...weird time to bring that up uh, miss?” God he hoped he got that right. “My apologies for all the touchin and shit back there." He clears his throat a bit embarrassed and ashamed he had not caught on faster. The long hair should have been enough to give the fact of the overbosses gender away. At least he hoped it was. He wonders what else he didn't notice.

"But uh, that's a good start in a way you know. Y'said fuck uh… social... rules..? or something I guess and decided being a woman was your thing? That's a want. You can work from there. Y'got anything else you feel this way about?"

X9 looks at him for a long time trying to rationalize what he was hearing. It's too absurd to believe for a second, that of all the ways gage could have taken this he took it as a conversation about gender, of all things. Especially considering the context.

"N...no." X9 says with a smile infecting his normal neutral features. He's laughing despite himself as things start to come together. He had called him man or guy at least twice before X9 had told him that. It was an honest mistake. 

"You ok boss?" Gage asks a bit irritated with himself over this. "What the fuck are you laughing about?"

"Gage…" X9 chuckles the names so mirthfully and with such an uncharacteristically big smile Gage has got to look away. Its the most he's ever seen from the other and pretty fucking weird to watch. 

"Gage, my sincerest apologies. I am not trying to tell you that I am a woman." He says trying to avoid giggling. "I meant that in a less..." He clears his throat. "in a different way." He shakes his head, his expression turning back to its usual coldness as he prepares to tell him the truth.

"I am a synth, Gage." And the confession is a lot less surprising than gage had ever expected.

"Oh." us all he can offer for a second. "Sorry boss." He offers.

"Its fine. Not to say I am not against the exploration of such a train of thought it's just…" He laughs a little. "That is a conversation I am not so sure you would wish to be involved in." 

"Huh? What's that supposed to mean? I've ran with plenty of folks that were like that... and all. Aint no shame-"

X9 smiles and holds out his hands to stop him. It was killing him, this man's level of misplaced understanding and tolerance.

"Gage!" He looks up at him. "I don't take you for some person that is not tolerant of these subjects! I was saying that I doubt you would want to have that conversation with me. That's all." 

Gage nods and withers a bit having misunderstood him twice in a row now.

"I'm still learning," X9 tells him, wanting to move on. "I have never wanted much, synths were built to obey, and though it was my place to lead other synths in my role I too was supposed to answer to a leader of my own." He clasps his hands together in front of him. "I want to want. I want very few things, but doing well for you is one thing that stands out among them."

Gage scoffs, unable to think of an appropriate response to surprisingly tender words. He blames the guys awkward level of kindness on his Being a synth.

"Then, well, you gotta-" He sighs. "Shit boss. I don't mind helping you and all, but I want you to make some choices for yourself too. Otherwise, you're more of a puppet than a leader." He rubs a hand down his own face. 

"Look. How about this. Think about it this way." He starts.

"You came here a good long while before they blew the institute sky high. You wanted your freedom and shit didn't ya? You're a runaway, right? And now that you're here and free you just gonna give that shit up? You're free to do whatever the fuck you want."

He makes a vague gesture to X9. "I mean other than like… you know, that shit you just said, you want something right?" 

X9 mulls over it in his head for a bit, his mind on something in specific.

"What if… what if we make a detour? There's something in mind." 

Gage smirks. "That's what I like to hear."

\-----

X9 sits with his feet up on an ottoman, a box of fancy lads in his hand and stacks of them piled around the fizztop grille. He pops one in his mouth and moans.

"Mm. That's good." X9 says with his mouth full. 

Gage stands at the bar setting more boxes down. "Y'sure sound pleased over there." He leans down and puts some away under counter. "I gotta say, boss, wasn't really expectin’ this of all things." 

Three days since their last conversation had passed. as glad as he was to see the overboss really living it up robbing suckers of their shit, seeing a man choke the life out of a man over nasty prewar junk food was a hard reality to face. It wasn't the horror of it all, he had killed for less, just the absurdity that seemed to cling to this man in everything he did, there was a hilarious darkness to it all.

"Its a want, is it not?" X9 shoves another cake in his mouth and another on top of that decimating both of them. "You asked for this."

Gage walks around from behind the bar and sits down with a bottle of water for himself. He sprawls out across the couch and rips his box open as well. "Reckon I did." He looks skeptically at the treats, he never really did like prewar food. 

"Not enough?" X9 inquiries finishing off a box and ripping into the next one with his teeth. 

"Nah, y'know I ain't in no place to judge," He tentatively takes a bite of one while X9 goes hog wild on the box he was emptying at a rate so alarming he can't help but watch the incomprehensibly ridiculous display. 

"Ok. Maybe a little bit a judgment is in order." When X9 tosses his box aside gage hands his over with furrowed brows. The taste of these things was awful. 

X9 accepts the box gladly and brutalizes everything in there as well. "There's a term I heard once," X9 says tossing another box aside. "He who is without sin may cast the first stone, or something to that nature." 

Gage snorts. "You'll find I throw all the stones I want." 

Both of them laugh a bit.

  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey lol this story is actually kind of an au of my fic rusted cage. same universe and sole, different life path for x9. and others haha, later chapters will explain. ha. so enjoy that.

There's nothing about the overboss's change he doesn't like. It all starts with the ponytail, swinging around as he runs ahead. It's a good look. No more hair in his face to hide behind. He exudes confidence he had not previously observed, a determination to take from the world what he's owed and then some.

The other changes came gradually. he was getting darker, his methods of combat less about how effective they could be and more about how much pain he could cause in any given moment. It's exhilarating, it's refreshing, and mostly it's a damn good show for the raider who was growing surer every day of his good fortune to have found this man wrangled into the gauntlet all that time ago.

"Nines, more fuckers comin in hot!" Gage shouts keeping a few of the commonwealth raiders at bay with a combat rifle. 

X9 whips around with his pistol level and ready for whoever decided foolishly enough to cross paths with him. He concentrates, eyes on the approaching swarm of raiders and sees it clearly. There's something behind them, a familiar black silhouette and shades. 

"Let's tear em up boss," Gage says readying himself for the carnage.

X9 nods. "The one in black approaching. Spare them. I need to talk." X9 says and sets off into work. Its a bloodbath, arms, and legs twisted beyond repair, limbs shot and hacked at until his opponents were helpless piles of parts on the ground still breathing and bleeding out. A kill shot was too easy, he wanted them to burn and wallow in the aching pains of dying as he did.

Gage comes in behind to finish everyone off and gather what he can from the remains. No use in leftovers when there was plenty of room for it all. 

Ahead the other courser sees a familiar coat on a familiar face and lowers his weapon trusting that he would not be fighting this particular raider any time soon.

"X6-88," X9 runs to fill the gap between them until he's filled the gap between them spare for a few feet.

"You. You're a courser." X6 says looking this near unrecognizable man over. "I never knew your designation, but you are, aren't you?" X6 can't say the other looks too bad considering all that's happened. 

"It's irrelevant," x9 assures him as gage approaches from behind.

"Well, what's all this, boss?" He says eyeing up x6 curiously expecting to get over on what looked like a poor lone chump ready for a stick-up.

"A man who could kill you quickly. Guns down." X9 assures him.

"This is what you do now?" X6 asks and as much as x9 wanted to pretend he was unaffected he would just be playing back into his old ways. There was no reason to bite his tongue. 

With a near unnerving calmness, he presses his gun to the others jaw. "I would prefer you not cast your stones." He begins. "The commonwealth is a glass house, we don't need another broken window." He can feel his trigger finger itch. He wants to shoot him just because he can. He wants to blast that straight-laced mild expression away and watch it leak red. He's free to do as he wishes, no reset looms over his shoulder for stepping out of line and doing something disgusting.

X6 swallows. "Of course." His voice is sounds unaffected enough but X9 can sense the anger in his features, the tightness of his jaw and tense movement. He exerts a great deal of confidence and lowers the gun with a finger. X9 allows it this time. 

"I would have assumed that most coursers had died in whatever battle came to the institute." X9 changes the subject. 

"Many did. The director wanted to leave me alive for reasons unknown and did not simply kill me on her way to complete her task." He informs him and X9 nods. 

"What are you doing now?" X9 asks but X6 knows better than to give away too much to a man like this. A raider would ruin all his plans. 

"Justin ayo. He is the one I am hunting currently. His most recent location is here." X6 tells him making no mention of the other scientist. "I presume you would have better use for him than I would." His eyes flick to x9s gun and then his eyes. "My search can end here if need be."

X9 nods as he thinks. Justin ayo. The high that washes over him is better than any chem in the commonwealth when he hears the news.

"Stay away from nuka world." He taps X6 on the cheek with his gun. "Next time I see your face you won't be let off like this unless you can get me Volkert or Secord." He smiles. "See you." He nods to gage who follows deciding to trust X9s assessment of this man and not cause any undue turmoil.

X6 turns around and heads back the way he came. He had his own engagements to return to at vault 88. 

"So you wanna explain why we ain't sack this guy for all he's got? I mean you imagine the manpower we got if we slap a collar on his ass?"

X9 shakes his head. "The collar scares men who fear death." He reloads his weapon absentmindedly. "He would die quickly. A waste. I make it a habit to not kill those like me and especially not collaring them." 

Gage sighs. "Well it's your call, but this is feelin like a load of-"

"I'm not going to fight a man like that. He's useless and not worth the trouble." He turns to glare at him. "Don't tell me to want and then bitch when I do." He takes no time to wait for him to respond and turns back to walking. He runs his thumb over the collar in his pocket given to him by mags.

"I have someone else in mind. maybe."

\-------

Justin Ayo doesn't even fight. He sees X9 and cowers, begging him for mercy the moment their eyes meet. Its nothing short of disturbing to see someone previously so powerful groveling at his feet. 

"Justin ayo." Is all he has to say to make the man sob. His stomach twists in knots. He can't do it.

"Ain't it always cute when they start beggin?" Gage walks over and pokes the scientist curled up on the ground with his gun. "Y'ready for the hell you earned little man?" 

"Please, I'll do anything you want! I can do anything you want, I swear it! Just please stop!" Justin howls from his place on the ground.

X9 arches a brow and approaches. "Anything?" 

Justin nods and covers his head with his arms. "Anything! I promise you, anything!" 

The courser mulls over his options for a moment much to gages displeasure.

"Nines, you really thinkin bout lettin this geezer go?"

"Give me a moment with him." He squats down before Justin. 

"Justin. Tell me. Do you remember unit Z2-47?" He asks.

"Y-yes? the unit killed and greentech-genetics..." His blood runs cold. The unit was dead. This was not the first time he had been asked a question like this in his exile. It never ended in anything that wasn't revenge.

"Good. He respected you greatly, sir. All of you humans actually. You made him believe that the future was worth dying for." He grabs Justin by the arm and rolls him over so they are face to face.

"He lived to serve the institute, putting aside his happiness to a large degree to be sure all of you could peacefully prosper." 

Justin stays still, wide-eyed and trembling violently.

"If you had said you didn't remember him... I would have killed you Ayo…" and Ayos trembling worsens.

"But you remember. One of the few people he looked up to remembers him and that makes me...happy." The word is said with a cold edge, happy, as if it were a threat. "Thank yourself for your memory and thank him for loving both you and myself the way he did. Per his wishes, I'm granting you an act of benevolence in his honor." He stands up and pulls Justin with him.

"Run. X6-88 was searching for you. Vanish. If I ever see your face again I'll kill you." He shoves the man hard and wasting no time Justin vanishes into the waste.

Gage contemplates saying something about all this, saying that perhaps he should have beat him at least, but the miserable look of the overboss keeps his mouth shut. 

X9 watches Justin a few moments longer before turning his attention to Gage. 

"We have a job to do." 

\-----

It's an awkward walk back to the park this time. The things revealed to him by the overboss’ actions today revealed a bit more about the man than he ever expected to learn.

Z2-47. He can't help but wonder what the two of them had been. He mentioned this z2-47 loving both of them so there was no telling what kind of love he was referring to. His first thought is romantic, no one gets that worked up over anything else. So caught up in his thoughts he doesn't even notice the rain until it's too late to complain about it coming.

"Fuckin commonwealth." He grumbles. "Way to rain on the fuckin parade." Gage sighs. "Let's get back fast boss."

X9 nods but it's like the old him is back. He's sullen and quiet. The only words he has are the ones that can't be communicated with the body alone.

Gage shuts his mouth and leaves the boss be. No use in letting a 2 person mercy ruin a killing streak list about a mile long.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I aint forget about this shit im just too lazy to post so here it is finally.

The encounter with the man in the shades and the old weeping bastard had a less than desirable effect on the overboss. 

Gage had to admit, he was taking a risk choosing whatever old fool that came through the gauntlet. For all he knew they could be any sort of creep or freak bringing god knows what to the table. Even worse they could be just the bleeding heart needed to bring the raiders here to their knees and ruin everything they had worked for. When he made his choice it was a mix of desperation and hope that the poor fool he trusted wouldn't let him down.

He casts a look over to the overboss. Lucky enough, and despite the drama in his past, he was shaping up to be a very good choice. Gage can't help but think he would be better if the man wasn't so damn gloomy. That was a price to pay when choosing with desperation. Perfection doesn't come cheap like Nines did.

"Boss." He breaks the silence between them, finally.

It's a stormy night and X9 stands looking out the window, unmoving and silent. He can't take it, he was too still for too long. He knows he's a synth, this stillness was probably normal to him, but even for them, it's a bit weird. Not that he had another synth as a point of reference. 

"Yes?" X9 answers but he doesn't look away from the storm.

"You wanna come over here n'talk to me real quick?" He asks and The boss says nothing.

"Boss?"

X9 turns around abruptly and Gage jumps, but relaxes.

“Jesus fucking christ man, be normal,” Gage complains and X9 nods. 

“Of course, my apologies.” He walks over and sits down on the couch next to him. “What is it?”

Gage twirls his hand as he thinks as if ushing them over to him from elsewhere. The words on the tip of his tongue but not close enough to his mind to call forth. “You…” When the words finally come to him he finds himself not wanting to say them.

“Me?” X9 tilts his head.

“You alright? You got me worried boss.” He places a hand on his shoulder. “Y’been acting weird about this shit for a while now, all that shit that happened with the guy in black and that geezer.” He squeezes his shoulder and X9 arches a brow.

“Worried? Have I slipped again?” He inquires.

“Not really, it's just…” He pauses. “Boss, forget what I said, yes, I do think you’re slippin again.”

X9 looks away, it was true.

“Like, a while ago you were really in your element, you were like a damn monster!” He rests a fist on his open palm as he says it as if to display X9 crushing opposition. “And then you start talking to this guy, to the old man Justin you called him, and you go right back to where you started.” He presses a palm to his face. “Hell, I wish you were back there, you got worse somehow. Earlier when we were out, you think I don't notice I bet, but I saw how you were moving.”

“And how was that.” He's still not looking at him, he knows where he went wrong.

“You’re not checking for shit, you run out into danger like you’re hoping to get shot in the face, you’re taking risks you really don’t need to and Nines…” He shakes X9 a bit to make some emphasis. “Boss, You’re one of the best damn things to happen to this place. I don't wanna see you fuck up over whatever the fuck it was that happened the other day.”

X9 maintains his unaffected expression, but finds himself rather pleased to be so highly regarded. He can't help but feel guilty knowing how much he meant to this man and how willingly he was throwing himself to his death right in front of him.

“I…” No, he himself didn't mean much to Gage he was sure. it was the work he did that mattered. He himself was just a means to an end. "Yes, of course…" 

Gage takes X9s collar in his hand and turns him so that their eyes met, a bit irritated that this conversation felt more like him attacking the overboss like a misbehaving child and less like two guys having a conversation.

"Boss, would you just fucking look at me?" He grumbles and X9 has to ask himself finally how this man could be comfortable with such casual intimacy like this. It was strange to be touched so much, aggressively or with the friendliness that came with the grabbing of his shoulder.

"Yes, of course. My apologies Gage." He secures gages wrist in his hand and lowers his arm. “Your frustrations are all completely reasonable. I promised to do this and now…I just...” He didn't want to rant to him, not without being given the go-ahead.

“Listen, boss.” He doesn't try to take his arm back. "I ain't normally one to give a damn about feelings and shit, but what we got here ain't something I wanna lose." He clears his throat. "So if you gotta get something off your chest or something... I mean...im all ears if it'll help you clean up your act."

x9 shrugs. "I'm sorry I'm making you do this."

"If it's for you and getting you back on track, it ain't that bad."

"If it's for me?" 

"Don't make it weird boss."

* * *

It was just about morning now, Gage was sleepless, laughing to himself about whatever it was on his mind.

“Are you tired?” x9 inquires.

"We done talkin?" 

"Gage." X9 says and shoves him a bit. "Go to sleep." 

"I'm serious." He chuckles. "You heard me out on everything. Connor, the family, all sorts of shit. If you got anything left to say bout this guy, Z, then ill sleep as soon as I've heard all of it." 

X9 sighs. "Well, I think I've covered just about everything. I...loved him, and when he died... I ran away. I couldn't find his corpse, and even now I don't know what to think of that." He was just repeating himself now, it felt good to just talk, to repeat himself and be sure he missed nothing, gage didn't mind.

"I realized that it was a foolish choice to remain loyal to the institute that cost him his life, and me, him." He sits up. "You were right in what you said, that people like me struggle every day and then die. That's what we were doing. I could lie to myself all I want, say that I was better off because I was built stronger, say that because I returned to the institute that I had a better life." He clenches his fist. 

Gage wanted to tell him that he had not mean X9 was the kind of person he was talking about, but thinking about all he had said so far, perhaps it was true, he silently let him continue.

"But we were just fools, slaves with better equipment. That is all.” He doesnt sound particularly impassioned, no, his words bleed with regret and misery.

“Cleaner cages, all it took was crystal clear glass walks to hold us in. We were complacent, we would not break them.” He shrugs. “It was not as if we could not. How many coursers had been lost in all those years, never returned?”

“And why did we do that? Because our walls looked better, were not shattered like those in the world around us? Because the ones who put us there were smart and we didn't wish to disrupt their studies? Over some unspoken pride in being better than the others who left for being better? For being good machines where they had failed?” He chuckles a bit.

“Becuase both they and we said that’s where we belong?" He laughs bitterly. "The institute is gone. He died for nothing, so it does not really matter."

Gage nods languidly. "You were a fuckin idiot." 

"I was." He did not mind being insulted, it felt good, almost. He ponders on the feeling. "We both were. Idiots clinging to servitude as some sort of moral high ground I-" He stops. Cathartic was the word he was looking for, finally being scolded for his staying by his makers side.

"He was an idiot and I am for letting him be, for never fighting him on it." He scoffs.

"Fighting for a better future for humanity? What was the point? We wouldn't be included. There was nothing in it for us." He scowls.

"If we had been selfish, reasonable and selfish, willing to fight for our rights to exist together, able to see the-" He was raising his voice and noticing that, he stopped. 

"Boss?" 

X9 nods. "I already told you this. Didn't I?" He laces his fingers together. "I'm just repeating what I said earlier." 

Gage nods. "Ain't no shame in getting it out, boss." He yawns. 

"Yes of course." He could have continued, he could have kept going on about his own foolishness, but the look in gages eyes gave way that the man must have been on his last few seconds of consciousness. He needed sleep.

“Gage, goodnight, please sleep.”

Gage yawns again, he had been doing it all throughout the rant and without even trying to get up, he fell asleep right where he sat.

X9 looks at him for a longer while than he felt he should have, never having spent much time with people who slept. He found the process quite strange. 

He leans in to look closer and gently touches the man's cheek to watch his response, specifically his lack of one.

“Hm,” He says satisfied with the look. He entertained the idea of poking him again, see what it would take to wake him back up again, but he knew he deserved rest for putting up with his antics.

“Goodnight.”

* * *

So he knew the whole story now, the boss was not one to spare details and that may have been for the best as he seemed better than ever now. 

Gage now knew the truth of the bosses past in its entirety. X9-27, a designation he would never wear again, the z2-47 he had mentioned that day was a lover lost at the hands of a woman who was simply looking for her lost son who now ruled the very place that had stolen him in the first place. It was a lot.

"A lot of drama." He mumbles to himself thinking about it.

The overboss is back to normal. not the bad normal where he sulked through life, but the good where he was tearing down enemies left and right. He was a shining beacon of hope in the eyes of his right-hand man.

"A lot of what?" Being immune to radiation was a good trait to have when traveling through kiddie kingdom.

"Friggin drama," Gage answers not too happy to be so exposed to all the rads, yeah, but he had the gear to keep from sucking much up.

"Thinking about the, as you called it, clusterfuck of a backstory the institute has?"

"It's a damn nightmare," he starts. "No offense to you nines, but I fucking hate synths." 

X9 nods in agreement. "A nightmare as you said. The institute was very ridiculous in many ways. I find that many unnecessary problems were brought about by them not caring about the mass paranoia they incited. For one making machines too close to humans in nature and appearance."

Gage nods. "And you don't feel weird saying that shit at all?"

"You have no problem admitting the flaws of your birth to pushovers to me. To say my existing is without room for criticism would be foolish."

Gage nods. He did hate Synths and his opinion had recently only changed a bit with the overboss admitting his nature. Still, after a bit of thinking, he found that he cared less about hating the individuals and more about them as a concept. He had been thinking about how many of the raiders in Nuka world could have been synths like his boss and found that perhaps he would not mind if they were.

"Lets just put an end to this ghoul, we can speak more after that," X9 says moving ahead, annoyed that this park was the only one left that he had not reclaimed.

* * *

X9 stood over the remains of Oswald, a hammer stuck in his skull coated in a glowing green was a delight to the senses. X9 looked at him on the ground mesmerized by the color.

He turns away from him after a minute, there was no more reason to be standing above him like this.

Gage stands by, ready to watch the boss assign the last park already knowing in his mind what might happen. His favor had been towards the operators and disciples, good. The pack didn't really have the right idea in comparison to Nisha and mags.

Inevitably X9 makes his choice leaving nothing to the pack. Gage is already making plans to deal with any coming conflict.

  
  



	4. Chapter 4

Gage knows for sure that things are going well. When presented with the chance to take settlements in the commonwealth X9 was more than willing. It was only natural to keep progressing when one experienced successes.

He and X9 sit close in the fizztop grille, X9 sitting back to chest just about between gages legs and gage focused intently on the tattoo on his neck inking over the binary to hide it. Needle in hand he does his best.

Gage wished he had a machine to do this, the more traditional methods are always so painful but the overboss seemed indifferent. Good, he thinks.

"Hm." Good is the word he repeats to himself in his mind. It wasn't like him to worry about the wellbeing of others, think about something as minor as if what he was doing hurt or not. A missing leg? Sure, hes gonna be concerned but he finds himself nowadays thinking about the smallest of things.

"What is it?" X9 asks with a mouthful of cakes.

"Nothin." Gage assures him. "Just thinkin." 

X9 wants to shrug but won't mess up gages work. 

There's silence, there's nothing to talk about, not really. Even with that in mind, neither of them find this silence uncomfortable. It's good, x9 thinks, a smile tugging at his lips thinking about some of the strange little things gage would say. 

“No news is good news.” He recalls out loud and Gages just sighs. 

“Y’reading my friggin mind or something boss?” He shakes his head, tickled and wondering if he was that predictable. 

X9 chuckles a bit. "If there were pressing matters, we would be discussing them, would we not?"

Gage nods in agreement. "Suppose so, But like you said." With that, he gets back to work for a few more minutes before X9 speaks up again.

“Do you think these settlers will try and make peace with us? Do you think we might find...Future little gages?” X9 inquires knowing very well how awkward his wording had been.

Gage arches a brow. “The fuck you on about boss?”

X9 shrugs. “What I mean is, not every settlement were taking will be full of pushovers. What do we say if one wishes to join us?”

Gage shrugs. “Y’got me boss, that's your call.” He says. “But I dunno, let em in. Anyone who ain't brain dead would wanna join up when we take the place.”

More silence, and it's alright. Gage finds himself for once not looking forward to heading out, instead being more content right where he was. It just urges him in confusion to work faster and get out.

* * *

The commonwealth is full of surprises, Gage knows this well, for one the rain pouring down is enough of a surprise on the day they should be taking a few suckers by storm.

"Stay away, what good is there in hurting us?" The man's voice is smooth and modulated as if he had practiced the line a few times. To gage who knew nothing of him it's strange, but X9 recognizes it in agony from the first word out of his mouth.

X9 stares at the asker of the question unsure of what to do with himself. He couldn't believe his eyes, Z2, or at least someone else in his skin stood before him trying to talk him down. He could hardly stand to see it. He blinks and hopes maybe he's seeing things but he knows that no such thing is occurring.

"Stand down and surrender, I don't want to hurt you," X9 informs him but this man in Z2s skin does not back down.

"And you think I'm just going to hand this place over, to you? This is my home, you can't be serious." He looked ready to fight and standing close behind Gage worries that there may be no good ending to this encounter no matter what he does. His mind is racing a mile a minute trying to find a way to turn this situation in their favor. The right words perhaps? A bullet between this mans eyes? He considers it for a second and can almost feel the ass-kicking from Nines. No, it was better to let him handle this, and if things got bad, take care of it.

"If you value your life, yes." Nines tightens his grip on his rifle as a show of willingness to attack. "To be honest, there is not much left to defend, don't waste your life on these people, synth." the word is spoken with such vitriol that the man in z2s skin looks worried. He looks to the people he was now defending and they seem unsure. Their trust had wavered with just one word. He winces, that was to be expected, especially after what had happened to the institute. there were so many lingering and hiding now.

"I am not a synth." He assures the raider. “I am a man, and I am not going to let you hurt these people, or take our home. That is a promise.” He had a hand on his own weapon, a not too shabby handgun that he seemed willing to draw. “I think you are the one who should be worried about your life.” Hes not confident he can take these two on, but perhaps feigning it would save them.

X9 breathes in and breathes out. He had to be reasonable. He looks into Z2s eyes searching for the warmth that had resided there once and finds that he cannot see anything of the man who used to be. No glimmer of recognition, no change of heart, nothing. Hes gone. Whoever reset him would never see justice for this crime, but he himself would be forced to deal with the fallout.

“So if you're done here, you can go now,” Z2 says and the others, while still a bit wary, realize that just calling him a synth is no proof of him being one. The accusation was thrown around so much nowadays. They knew him, he was a friend who never acted strangely. He never showed any signs of being a synth.

X9 looks from him to the people cowering behind him and to him again. Hes silent, pondering his next move.

“So, you dont remember anything? Not even a dream, a sense of recognition?” He lifts his weapon, knowing now what he had to do.

“Oh, I recognize you sir, a raider just like the rest. However, you would be far more familiar in a pile on the ground.” He would not back down either.

* * *

No one says anything as the rain pours down, Gage is far beyond elated but at the same time, more distressed than he has ever been in his entire life by this entire experience.

The sound of struggling is white noise to X9 who drags his new prisoner behind him by ropes secured to his legs. He had to tune it out or run the risk of losing his mind. The rain hides the tears rolling down his cheeks, the thunder drowns out the sounds that come from his throat with them.

Gage looks down at the reset courser being dragged through the mud with just a little sympathy, only because he knows the whole story, that and being dragged through mud in the rain must be rough. His long black hair covered in thick mud clings to his skin, his arms that are bound frantically writhe and wriggle to get the ropes off. Its a horrible display.

Still, he's got no room in him to start acting like a bleeding heart for the sad sack of shit who couldn't defend himself. Just goes to show who the better of the two of them was, if his opinion meant anything.

* * *

With Z2, or Jonny as he's been calling himself, collared and just about anchored to the overbosses home at the fizztop grille they could return to work. Z2 was able to put up a fuss until the overboss silenced him with the promise of starvation as his death should he keep making noise. 

“Funny how quick you were to quiet yourself, you're a synth. You know you need no food to survive, right?” X9 tells him and Z2 looks away from him, scowling. He wouldn't hear a word of it.

“I am not a synth.”

X9 nods. “Of course not, you couldn't possibly be, you remember everything about your life, about all you did before now, dont you?” He laughs bitterly. “To know what the railroad was able to do to you, its sickening.” He has to leave, Gage is waiting by the elevator for him so they can get back to business. 

“There was no railroad! I have always been me!” 

Gage sees the change in expression on X9s face while Z2 who stood behind him did not. “Boss...We gotta get going.” He worries that he might turn around and keep arguing in circles, but he gives him a chance not to.

X9 says nothing, just inhales and lets it go. Just forget it and get to more important things.

“You are absolutely correct.”

* * *

The commonwealth is no different to him now as a raider than it was as a courser. Filled with weak and cowardly settlers waiting to be torn apart as a part of his mission. He looks into the eyes of a man sliding off of his arm that he had forced through his torso. He holds some visceral part of him in his hand, but doesn't bother to try and figure out what it is. It doesn't matter so long as it gets him dead, fast. 

Blue eyes look at him full of tears, but this sorrow falls on deaf ears. He doesnt care, only thinks about the discomfort of warmth and blood. His eyes are like Z2s, devoid of recognition and understanding. They're fearful and contemptuous. But where z2 failed this man excelled. His fear was warranted, was expected, and brought him no discomfort of knowing that the face before him should never have been making such expressions. This was normal, Z2 was not.

The man slumps to the ground, guts spilling out the back of the hole, and he falls on his knees. X9 flicks blood from his arm and the rest leftover is wiped on his shirt. 

“What's next?” He inquires kicking the man over, leaving him like that would be his normal move but he was feeling particularly ready for more carnage. He wished that he could bring the man back and kill him again even.

“That about does it,” Gage says standing over the hole filled corpse of a woman who fought hard, but not hard enough. He rolls her head over with his foot to get a better look at her face and arches a brow at her beauty. “Shame as it is, shit heres clear. We can head back now if youre up for it," He starts.

"But I mean...Nines...Shits weird.” He admits.

The overboss sighs and rolls his eyes back knowing that this conversation was coming up, but not really wanting to have it. Still, he would not brush him off. He was beyond that. Gage was his friend. 

“Yeah yeah, roll your fuckin eyes, I feel ya boss but really…”

“I can't do it, and I cant let anyone else do it… I can't hurt him. Gage...He was everything to me.” He covers his face, his eyes specifically as if holding something back from spilling out. Gage looks away from the display knowing he was crying but not wanting to see it.

“So he's a pet now? Boss, that's fine and dandy but… y’know. It might sound weird comin from a raider but aint that kinda-”

“Fucked up? It is. He is no longer the person I..." He can't even say love without getting choked up so he does not. "But I cannot let him go, the body is still his. His face, his…” He grits his teeth just thinking about it. “...It's sickening. Im going to be sick just thinking about it.” 

“It ain't him, boss, I know how ya feel. You finally find him up and standing and all but…” He fishes for something to say, as in all actuallity he had no fucking clue what this must have felt like. “Y’never planned for this? What did you guys agree on doing if this shit ever happened?”

X9 shakes his head and leans over trying to keep his voice lever and cool, he doesn't want to let anything out at a time like this. “No, I can't do it,” He insists.

“Boss, you promised him, c’mon! Y’must have ha-” He begins but is cut off by X9, snapping at him.

“I can't do that Gage!” He just about howls before returning to his usual self. The tears all but stop, he stands upright, and he turns away from him. “I won't leave you with Nuka world on your hands. My plan upon his death, via reset or other causes was to leave the commonwealth, to retain some good memories so that he might linger among them. Theres no way in hell im doing something that...That…” His mouth is moving but no sound comes out. He cant call it ridiculous.

“Boss…” He hadn't expected such an answer. In a case like this he had been expecting suicide or something, but something like that, something so sentimental seemed strange from what he knew of the bosses old work.

“So no, I cannot respect his wishes, to let him live and leave, not after all the work I have done, not after how long I have missed him. But he is no longer here, I have only his face. What Does one do but hold on to what they love?”

Gage groans, he really was sick of this. “Listen! Boss!” He walks up and grabs him by the shoulder and spins him around so they stand face to face. “No! Nines, Listen,” He gives his arm a squeeze. “Theres no use in doing this, if y’think hes dead cause he got reset then what the fuck are you doin other than defiling a corpse? Y’think he wants this?”

X9 says nothing, just looks to Gage with tired eyes and words starting to form that never come.

“Kill him, Its mercy. He wouldn't want you livin like this. Heart breakin every day or whatever. Kill him.” Gage assures him but feels a bit sick with himself as he looks at the miserable face of the overboss. 

He had never been uncomfortable offering the advice to murder, the weak lost and the strong won. That was only natural, but this request made him feel weak. He thought about X9 and Z2, what they might have been like together before and feels a twinge of envy that is sated well by the idea of Z2 dropping dead.

“Or something…” He never went back on his word like this, but the feeling is so overwhelmingly sickening that he can't commit to it. He was getting soft and it irritated him to no end. “Just quit hurting like this boss, it ain't right.” He hated to feel this way and hated to see him feel the way he did as well.

"Or something?" X9 laughs bitterly. "It's not like you to second guess yourself." He isn't happy, no he still looks as miserable as he had before but he does find the sudden change in character odd. "You just want me to kill him so I have no more distractions left to keep us from your Nuka World dream, no?"

"Nines, you're being a fuckin cunt, you know that?"

X9 shrugs and laughs a bit again. "But you do not deny it, you hate this, not out of some sort of sympathy for me but by irritation with your agent operating at half his best capacity. It is very much alright to just say you want me to shut up and do my job."   
  


Gage sighs and runs his hand down his own face. "Boss, listen, you wanna think that? Fine, but ima tell you how it is; you ain't no cash fucking cow, youre my friend and you look me in the face doubting that? I call bullshit nines. You're talkin out your ass because youre hurting. Let's get back to the park, and how about you shut the hell up until you get out of your piss fit of a mood."

X9 does not refuse his orders.


End file.
